People say it’s only natural
Being hurt, being the fool again
And that I’d be free and loved
But tell me when, tell me whenHow do I go on, pretend nothing’s changed
when I’m already dying inside
you left a scar in my heart, you killed my soul,
you’ve burned a mark on my mind
They are right that it’s hard to just forget about something that has changed your life so drastically and so dramatically and nothing is more dramatic than having a child at such an early age with such an irresponsible guy. I know, I know objectively, I’m not the youngest mother around, and I know I’m not the most jaded mom either and that there are men out there worse that you.
I should have brought this up long ago but the hope of you changing stopped me and I think I’ve held onto this grudge for a long time now, it’s time to tell the world how good/bad of a man you are.
You destroyed me. You got me pregnant and even throughout the pregnancy, you mistreated me, you made me cry every single night because you felt insecure. And when my parents found out, you still continued on being selfish. You never told your family about me and my daughter and only during my time of labor did you have the guts to admit to your own father that you have a kid on the way. And up until now, you still manage to hide don’t you? Pretend you’re still single and don’t give shit about the welfare of my daughter?
You were never there. I never felt your presence. You never gave any financial support. During my pregnancy, I was the one working my ass off to save up for her birth and you? You managed to borrow money from me and didn’t even remember to pay up even till now!
On her christening, you were the one with the most visitors, they’re my friends too but you never shared any money to pay for the expenses even after the event. Your family never visited us to check on us, what kind of family is that? Unaware that their relatives have a family now? Not nagging about responsibilities you’re leaving behind. Tell me, does your father even ask if you have visited your daughter today and gave the support she needs? All the while I ate my pride and asked support from my family and relatives just so I could raise my daughter all by myself. I have yet to continue my studies because of you. It’s not my daughter’s fault, it’s YOU, your fault, your stupid ways! If you would just help out, I wouldn’t worry so much about leaving my daughter to fix my records and documents.
I hate you so much for not giving a damn. I hate you so much for not having the decency to help out with matters that you should take responsibility for. I was civil to you just so we can work things out for the baby and where are you now? You weren’t present during baby’s birthday. You haven’t visited her in months, we haven’t heard from you since I have no f*cking idea. I ran across Chico the other day, you asked him why he wasn’t present on my baby’s birthday, and I want to ask you the same!
You know what, I thank God everyday I was spared from marrying you (it hurts to get that diba? wala pa yan sa sakit na binigay mo sakin! Not even half of the pain) and I am more thankful that my family is here to help me pick up the pieces of my life, and keep me strong.
You have never hurt me physically, but the pain you inflicted emotionally and the chaos you’ve put in my brain has affected me and my daughter to an extent that I can no longer forgive you. I shouldn’t have named her after you. I shouldn’t have allowed her to use your last name, you don’t deserve any credit for being her father when someone else is taking that responsibility for you. You destroyed my youth, my freedom, my education, my future, and my soul. You destroyed me. I want to take back everything and I want you to pay dearly.
I can’t even imagine, and you don’t deserve to go through this at all. It’s a huge fear of mine and why I don’t have children, because I so desperately want it 50/50, as in the father being 50% responsible, involved, taking part. I fear being abandoned and that’s just what happened to you. 
